HI, You Damn Turtles!



Oy god, how bad am I procrastinating on an article? THIS BAD.



So i can't go running no more, shit, cuz some damn robbers have taken over my neighborhood, in fact, the very street where I go "running," (ha ha ha, old lady terrycloth jogging is more like it), at the very time of day when i go "running," and they're doing ridiculous crazy shit like: going into people's houses and pretending to have a gun, somehow, and forcing people to drive them to south central, then take out two $700 withdrawals from an ATM. I guess that's what you do if you're a robber with no car in L.A. Audacity and creativity are the keys to success in Hollywood.



"Um, cool, so, I'll rob you, but-- i know it's kind of out of your way and everything, but would you mind dropping me off?"



So now i don't know how I'm going to get ready for summer. crime is definitely putting a crimp in my workout schedule.



where's mcgruff when you need him? down at the bar. i tell you.



fuuuck. i have to write.



Comments

Popular Posts